The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!"
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!"
The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"
The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime!"
The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if here's anything she can do for them."
The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"
Thanks to Shaun C for forwarding this joke!
It only took the doctor a few seconds to say, "Ma'am your daughter is pregnant!"
The mother became very angry, and she argued with the physician that 'her' daughter was a good girl, and would never have sex with a boy.
The doctor faced the window and silently looked into the horizon.
The mother became furious and yelled, "Why are you looking out the window? Aren't you paying attention to what I said?"
"Yes, of course I am. It's just that the last time this occurred, a bright star appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they would show up again, and help answer how your daughter became pregnant!
The teacher remarked it was impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though they were a very huge mammal their throat was very small.
The young girl stated Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
The teacher repeated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was impossible.
The ypung girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The young girl replied, "Then you ask him."
The Father said, "Good Morning to you! Aren't you Mrs. O'Malley and didn't I marry you and your husband 1 year ago?"
She replied, "Sure, that you did, Father."
The Father asked, "And would there be there a little one yet?"
She replied, "No, not yet, Father."
The Father said, "Well, now, I'm going to Rome next week and I'll light a candle for you and your husband."
She replied, "Oh, thank you, Father." Then they went their separate ways.
Some years later they met again. The Father asked, "Well now, Mrs. O'Malley, how are you these days?"
She replied, "Oh, very well, Father!"
The Father asked, "And tell me, have you been blessed with any young ones yet?"
She replied, "Oh yes, Father! Three sets of twin boys and 4 girls, 10 all together"
The Father said, "That's wonderful! How is your loving other half doing?"
She replied, "Well, he's gone to Rome to blow out your bloody candle."