Glad we didn't go on that cruise with your wack job friend Noah

Image: Unicorns

Suddenly, Father realized he should not have bought the new crucifix at Ikea.

Suddenly, Father realized he should not have bought the new crucifix at Ikea.

The Priest and Mozart Joke

priest in robe
When Mozart passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Mozart was buried.
Terrified, the drunk ran and got the town Priest to come and listen.

When the Priest arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Mozart's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards."

He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling."
So the Priest kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..."

Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the Priest; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My friends, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Mozart decomposing."

My Husband Died Last Night Joke

priest holding Bible
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.
He says, "So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?"
She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night."
The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father."
The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary? "
She says, he said, 'Please Mary, put down that damn gun...'

Thanks Jim K!